Monday, February 6, 2012

Motherhood

Being a mom makes me miss my own mom so much more than I ever did.  She and my dad have retired from the Air Force and live in Indianapolis.  I never imagined my life taking me where it has.  I am a product of an Air Force marriage, and now I'm married into the Air Force.  My mom left Minneapolis and my grandparents behind when she was 18 to join the military.  I always told her I wouldn't leave her.  I ended up doing the same thing to her as she did to them.  Yes, I missed her when I first moved away, but now that I have my daughter, I miss her and my dad even more.  Now I understand exactly how my mom felt raising me and my younger brother without her parents.  She comes to Louisiana to visit often, but it's just not the same. 

When me and my husband first found out that I was pregnant, I was so happy, but so terrified at the same time.  I was afraid I wasn't going to know how to take care of my baby.  (Especially because my mom wasn't here to help me.)  I kept worrying myself to death throughout my whole pregnancy; but as soon as I saw Jordyn's face and held her for the first time, all that worry melted away.  I realized that motherhood came naturally to me.  I knew exactly what to do for her and when to do it. 

I've always felt like I was doing so great in my life, and that I would continue to do great things for myself and others.  But now I feel like bringing another life into the world is the greatest thing I'll ever do.  It's an extraordinary feeling to have a child.  It's still so surreal to me, even after 5 months.  I'm a lot more tired than I used to be, and there is a lot more I have to do in my days, but I would never trade it for anything.  I love being her mom.  It's the greatest joy I have ever felt. 

I feel so complete when she looks at me and laughs.  And I feel even more complete when I see my husband and his babygirl together.  This is what my life is supposed to be!

By the way, I love sharing pictures! That is the most cliche thing a mom can do, but I can't help it!

I waited 3 months just so she could wear this for tax season!


Jordyn and her 6'5" daddy.


4 comments:

  1. Wow your baby is so adorable. I can already tell she will be tall! It looks to me your doing an awesome job at motherhood by sharing your pictures which I love! Hang in there! I miss my mother too.

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  2. Your baby is too cute! Such a beautiful skin color. My sister is pregnant, and she is excited and terrified for the same thing. It's getting so close- I can't wait for her to have him!

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  3. Thank you for all the compliments. She is the greatest joy of my life. Eman, congrats to you and your sister. I was very scared when I started getting closer to having my daughter. After I had her, all those fears went away and I just felt very proud to be her mother, and very excited to start my life with her.

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  4. Beautiful children!

    K. Smith
    Engl 226

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